Businesses Love Government Spending

During the campaigns, there was much hoo-hah about the government spending. Barack Obama said the government should spend less. Mitt Romney said the government should spend a lot less. It seemed that everyone agreed: government spending should be cut. Everyone, except for the business community.

Generally, the business community gave its money to Mitt Romney, but on the subject of government spending, we actually differed substantially from candidate Mitt. The truth is, businesses love government spending. Government checks are bigger, more consistent, and easily procured through lobbying dollars.

There are basically three ways a business can make money: selling to consumers, selling to other businesses, and selling to the government. Consumers and businesses are highly fickle. Sure, you can attempt to build some brand loyalty which will keep people buying your product or service, but these are cutthroat markets where businesses are constantly competing against each other to deliver more for less.

Government spending is a lot more predictable. Contracts, grants, and incentives are doled out in the millions and billions of dollars, and they last for years. That creates a nice little revenue stream. What’s more, unlike consumer and business spending, government spending is recession-proof. If the markets take a dive, the government often ramps up spending to moderate the drop-off in spending from the other two sectors. A business like TimmyCo doesn’t even need to spend money on building brand loyalty; we only need to ramp up our lobbying dollars, which at 22,000% return pay off much better than other investments.

Businesses want government spending. Businesses need government spending.

A piggy bank with a list of subsidies that corporations raid the government for

Why pay for the whole hog when you can get the bacon for free.

As politicians debate what to do about the so-called fiscal cliff, it is instructive to see what the business community does. While the conservative base demands massive cuts to government spending and liberals ask for more taxes for the wealthy, businesses only issue blanket statements professing a desire for some sort of resolution. Our hope, which we express through lobbying dollars, is that the current system of low taxes and high spending keeps coming. This system works very well for us.

“Mitt Romney was right,” a spokesperson for TimmyCo stated, “there is a large part of the population who wants to take from the government without giving back. But it isn’t the Democratic base. It’s the business community.”

Those You Can Trust:

Our accomplices in getting the government to spend on us: losing politicians.

Our biggest scam: Making governments think we care about creating jobs.

Those You Cannot Trust:

How did we get that 22,000% return number? Here.

Texas spent millions of dollars to lure companies to create jobs in Texas. The jobs came, but they were low paying and the amount of money spent would’ve been more efficiently used in creating public sector jobs. That’s OK, the money only came at a cost to local schools.

GM begs for state subsidies when it suits them but then cites the “free market” when they want to cut costs (read: eliminate jobs). Governments, that’s just the cost of doing business with business.

Want to know what corporations are raiding the state government piggy banks? Go to the Good Jobs First Subsidy Tracker.

How much is corporate welfare worth? The Cato Institute says $100 billion. Think By Numbers says it’s $92 billion (which is substantially more than the $59 billion in social welfare spending that everyone gets all nutty about).

You say tax incentives aren’t truly spending cuts. What if we said that they are essentially tax hikes to everyone who doesn’t receive them? But we didn’t say that. This guy at MauledAgain said it.

We hope that no one reads this blog, ataxingmatter, which basically exposes the businesses on the right wing for the hypocrisy of standing against taxes, but also asking for government handouts. Remember, watch what businesses say during the fiscal cliff debates. They won’t say anything except that they want it to be resolved. That means they want everything to stay just the way it is right now.

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About timmyco

TimmyCo is the world’s leading evil corporation. We implement innovative processes and technologies to help our customers pay us more money than they had before.
This entry was posted in Jobs, Politics, Privatization and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Businesses Love Government Spending

  1. therogueandpeasantslave says:

    Timmyco, you bastards, thanks for the fresh insights to make my Christmas so much more merry.

  2. Pingback: TimmyCo Believes Workers Have the Right to Work Cheaply | TimmyCo

  3. Pingback: How Does a Politician Create a Job? Build Their State on Oil. | TimmyCo

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